Week 4 Recap: And then there was 1. And 9.

-You magnificent bastard.-

And the battle of Week 4 is concluded. Blows were thrown. Saviors were forsaken. And victory was had. Despite all of Cole's nervous pacing and curmudgeon fist-shaking, he was able to stagger away from RWPilk's team and into first place. Four weeks in and the lines have been drawn... but there's still a lot of football left. What's the forecast? Perhaps our two authors know. Perhaps.

Cole

Current Standing: 3-1, 1st Overall

I for one would like to start by sending a small shout-out to Matt Forte, whose 37-yard touchdown scamper in garbage time was a dagger to Sweet Fancy Moses, which had been obnoxiously hanging around all afternoon. With two carries totaling 91 yards (not to mention his first score), Forte made me glad I picked him third overall. It also gave him 19 points, nearly doubling his season total for the third straight week. I've done some extrapolation, and let me tell you, those are some crunchy numbers. Suffice it to say by the league playoffs, Forte will have enough yardage to stretch from Chicago to Phoenix. With a stopover in Seattle.

And Brandon Marshall. I mean, whew. Thank God this was not a close game; I'd be willing to bet there were a lot of furious owners drinking themselves into oblivion after the Cowboys' defense lost the ability to tackle and gave Kyle Orton a second last-second touchdown. At this rate, Kardiak Kyle will make Brett Favre look like JaMarcus Russell.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves. I just want to take it one game at a time. I'm just focusing on beating The Golden Boys next week. No, it doesn't mean anything that I didn't shake Rob's hand after the game. And I am NOT videotaping his roster selection. Sheesh.

RWPilk

Current Standing: 1-3, 9th Overall

Oh, woe is me. Things are not going well in the "Sweet Fancy Moses" camp. As you can tell, I lost. I'm now 1-3 with the season 1/4 over. There's still time, but this is a hole people. And if things are gonna get back to at least interesting, my record has to get competitive fast.

There's really only one big, glaring, air traffic controller-flagged failure in my roster this week: Drew f****** Brees. The hype machine is still rolling on Mr. Brees, as (when he comes back from his bye) is still a "must start" in all leagues. Two weeks in a row he's scored less than 10 points. Hell, less than 8. Everyone is telling me oh wow, what a great pick, Brees is gonna be the lead scorer by years end. When? It won't matter when I'm in 11th. These games count now. My must-sit RBs, that I had almost no choice but to play, scored just a point or two shy of "the best pick ever." Jacksonville's Garrard, on my bench, would have won the game for me in Brees' place. But such is the nature of fantasy sports. It's not that I ain't thankful for your 48 point Week 1, Drew. Is it possible to spread that around a little?

There are some other weak spots. My running game is hurtin', but Westbrook will be back next week (according to reports). And with some obligatory bye spots down, I can empty a few spots and look for some new players. Until then, the Sweet Fancy Moses, and my "hogwash" fantasy theory, is listed as "questionable" for Week 5.