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Questions? Comments? Passionate proclamations of your unwavering loyalty? Let's hear 'em. Sweet, Sweet Flacco Action! now has an email address. So get typin' and let her rip.

ssfa.mail [at] gmail.com

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Also, don't forget to check out Cole and RWPilk on Twitter!
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Too Many Beaks

-You whippersnappers, with your dreadlocks! And your McIntosh computers!-

RWPilk

Current Standing: 1-1, 5th overall

Hell and damnation! Two weeks in and I already popped my "loss" cherry. Peyton Manning, a curse on your never-branching family tree. And Brandon Marshall, how does riding the pine in Week 3 sound!? Yeah, you think about that! Until then, wear this abnormally long funnel on your head until I find a dunce cap.

Alright. Back to mid-week randomness. As you might have read, I've checked out a few athlete Twitter accounts. Twitter's a great idea for sports, right? A first hand account inside the game! Awesome. Awesome? Eh. I gotta tell you people, it's losing a bit of its luster.

Late Monday, PFT reported more NFL Twitter action, this time documenting a rift in the sacred bond between QB and receiver. Gasp! All might not be well in Arizona, people. Word around the knitters' circle is WR Larry Fitzgerald ain't all too pleased with the amount of ball action he's getting from Kurt Warner (pause). This comes on behalf of tweets from Larry's younger brother Marcus.

Apparently, Marcus received texts from big bro Larry during the game Sunday about not being thrown the ball enough, that WR long-ball has been cut down for shorter passes to RBs. Oh, boy. And the phrase "80-year old" was used to describe Warner.

C'mon, brothers Fitzy. First of all, Arizona won that game and old man Warner broke a record for completion percentage. Second of all, "80-year old"? Kurt Warner is a very spry 68-year old man and starts each day a with a glass of warm milk, a boiled egg, a crisp issue of Reader's Digest, and tops it off with a Werther's Original. Sigh. What am I doing? Writing about the Cardinals? Is it next Sunday? Is Westbrook probable yet?

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Twittergate '09

-Don't worry little guy, we're in this together.-

RWPilk

09/17/09, Sweet Sweet Journalistic Inaccuracy Action!: Ah, so it appears that after a quick search of Ochocinco Twitter accounts, and not yielding a "verified account" page, I picked the wrong one. There is now (or could have always been) a verified #85 Twitter page, and it wasn't the one I cited, which explains the mix up. So, while amusing, the below article is bologna. Not saying I was wrong or anything, or lazy, or rushed. No. Didn't happen. but, you know. Bologna.

I don't like sports too much, but since acquiring SSFA! I've had to read a lot of about them. Boring. I have, however, become a fan of certain athletes' Twitter accounts. Cut to Chad Ochocinco, the Bengals WR with the name goofier than most Bond villains. He's a infamous tweeter apparently, and left many followers wondering what would happen now that the NFL is cracking down on players using social media. You know, because if a player out there wants to know "who's playin dat madden?", well that's gonna ruffle a few feathers.

Anyway, Ochocinco was bold enough at a press conference to apologize to the NFL in advance, claiming that he WOULD be tweeting before, during, and after games. Say whaaa?! Apparently, Ochocinco had read the NFL social media policy and "found loopholes." Whoa, take it NFL! Loopholes. Eat it. Can we get John Grisham in here to document this unfolding "lone man against the system" drama? Settle down, spaz, it gets weirder.

The usually reliable PFT over at MSNBC reported today that Ochocinco had broken his tweeting silence with the message "Storm coming!" Yeah, alright whatever. But when I checked Ochocinco's Twitter page, that tweet was nowhere to be found, but this was:

"im not going to quit tweetin,but i wont tweet during games ight peeps,the leagues getting on me"

No! Don't give up, Chad! This high drama of intrigue and suspense has barely even started! You still have to break into the NFL super computer mainframe hub, all Tom Cruise/Mission Impossible 1, ropes and pulley-like and tweet from there! That'll show'em! You can't give in! Not yet!

Sigh. Anyway, NFL season commences tonight. My sanity may audibly sigh in relief.

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Shaqpot!

- #bromance -

RWPilk

So slow was the sports news day yesterday that I found myself trying squeeze a single drop of amusement from a Mexico defeats America soccer headline. But before I slipped into an infinite coma, I was saved by the "big black unit": You guessed it, SHAQ. Apparently, Shazam Shaquille was with Cardinal Albert Pujols to promote some reality show and referred to himself as "Shaqqie Robinson," sending the press giggling like a school girl being tackled by a dozen kittens.

I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy; perhaps I wasn't getting enough Shaqness in my life (now that it isn't 1998 anymore). But I suddenly remembered Twitter, and to my excellent fortune found THE_REAL_SHAQ. See for yourself, as I'm still trying to somehow quantify the ocean of priceless Shaqitude I've stumbled upon:

Attention all scrabble players, question, is pigsriot a word

Holy shit, I'm at the santa monica airport I just saw a lil plane crash, and the guy walk away, dam dam glad he's ok shit, excuse my words

Happy birthday , harry potter main charachter dude

Anybody seen that 7 year old kid driving, running from the cops

The white house wouldn't let me in, whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Whoever told Shaq that Twitter is a magic telephone in which he can get instant responses to any idle curiousity that he asks at any given time... Let me buy you a drink. As you can clearly see, I no longer have any need for television, the cinema, radio, or any form of print media entertainment. I have THE_REAL_SHAQ. And it's more than enough. Tweet on, Shaqinator. Tweet on.

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