Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Are You ****ing ****ing Me?

-A civil union if I ever did see one-


Oh, SSFA! readers, we've had some good times. Some real laughs. But let's put erotically posed G.I. Joes down, it's adult time now. That's right. It's all fun and games until some self-important jerk starts toying with idea of running for Congress.

The breaking news Tuesday afternoon is that former Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling was contacted about making a run at Ted Kennedy's vacant seat in the Senate. Wow. You gotta hand it to the Republican Party, they do have a good eye for marketing. What better way to win over the bluest of blue states than with a bona fide Bahston Red Sawk? Who's he gonna run against? This guy?

If Schilling knows what's good for him, he'll decline on this nonsense for many years to come. Most MA residents still know him as the clutch guy. The bloody sock. The guy who helped get their bread bowl eating hands on the 2004 title. That's fine. But Schilling has a big I-Can't-Shut-the-Hell-up problem. He openly bashes other athletes, aggressively campaigned for Bush, and did commercials for Ford. Yeah, Ford. I know it. Disgusting.

"My hope is that we're past that (bi-partisanship). That we're past the whole R and D thing." Schilling said when asked if he thought running as a Republican in MA was a good idea. Heads up, Curt: We ain't. We just want to remember you as the pitcher, man. You did good. We all still like you (sorta). Don't mess that up.

Fun fact: Did you know Curt Schilling is an avid role-playing gamer? He runs 38 Studios, a developer of on-line games. Huh. Something new every day. Still Curt, keep your +4 gauntlets of Scion to yourself and off the Capitol building.


  1. I'm disgusted. We may as well ask Joe the Plumber to run for POTUS.

  2. I did know that he was an avid role-playing gamer and I've been hearing about his "game" for years now. Let him stick to writing his blog that no one cares about.

  3. Oh those wacky bloggers, hanging out in their mothers' basements, writing stuff nobody reads ... buncha losers, amirite?

    I would be extremely surprised if Schilling actually ends up running. He has to realize that the more he talks, the more people despise him, and that just because you can throw a baseball really fast doesn't mean you're qualified to hold any sort of public office.

    When asked about the possibility of running, Schilling said he hoped it wouldn't matter that he was a Republican in an extremely Democratic state, that "good people" were needed to fix the problems with this country. It's a fine sentiment, but not one I'd be harping on too much if I were Schilling. After all, if you accept that, is the best option a person with two years' junior college and whose international relations experience consists of Manny Ramirez?

  4. Glad you weighed in, Cole. Nice.

    Schilling has always been a jackass. I'll never forget the joy of the 2004 post season, but every time this guy is in front a microphone, I wanna pelt him with heavy, blunt objects.

    Not too heavy though. I'm outta shape.