Friday, September 18, 2009

Week 2 Preview: Hold the Mayo!

-No! Don't leave me!-

The war over fantasy sports theory rages on as Cole and RWPilk dive head-first and nose-plugged into the icy waters of Week 2. Let's go to them now and see who can talk the most trash about this week's match-ups! ... And don't forget to check out our teams and cast a vote in our DRAFT POLL, immediately to your right!

Current Standing: 1-0, Tied for 2nd Overall

Another weekend already upon us? Times flies when you're kicking ass. Nah, it's too early to tell, but it's hard not to feel a little comfortable considering my team's performance last week. Drew Brees won't be playing the Lions again, and will score less than 48 points, I guess. I played with Peyton Manning's notorious "cooled off" year last season though. As long as Brees is in the black by halftime, it's a luxury for me. So, I'm marching into battle with the same roster as last week. Just based on numbers, I considered subbing RB Johnson for RB Ahmed Bradshaw, but Johnson is facing the Raiders D this week. Ka-Ching!

As for actual viewership, not sure what game I might catch. I'll look forward to Colts vs Dolphins Monday night, there are two quarterbacks I like rooting for (Go, Pennington!). I'm wondering about the grass roots movement that's being spearheaded by coach Rex Ryan in New York for the Pats game. Dialing for Disses. I like it. I ain't convinced though, say what you want about the Bills last week, the Jets ALWAYS seem to blow close games with the Pats on stupid mistakes (in recent years anyway). Still, it's hard not to put your confidence in a guy named Rex.

Current Standing: 1-0, 6th Overall

Rob tells me I write better when I'm angry, so OH MAN YOU GUYS AM I FRIGGIN' PISSED. I'm so angry I could bite the head off a marmoset, as soon as I figure out what the hell one is.

Ah, screw it. I can't keep this up. Look, am I happy only beat Rob's mom by five points in Week 1? No. Am I happy I'm playing the guy with the highest point total from last week? No. Am I happy Donovan McNabb is going to miss the opportunity to put up huge points against a porous Saints defense? No. Come back soon, Donnie Mac. I have faith in you. Not sure why, exactly, but hey, there you go.

What's that? Oh. Right. Football. Fine.

While my fantasy team is underperforming, at least I have some better games this week. The Patriots haven't lost in the Meadowlands since 2000, but that defense looked impressive against a stacked (no, really) Houston offense. Belichick is renowned for making rookie quarterbacks cry, but now he'll be without middle linebacker Jerod Mayo for two months. Tough matchup.

And Rob's probably boasting about the huge game he stumbled across last week. Whatever. How do you think he knew Larry Johnson was playing the Raiders this week? Come on. Dude doesn't know the Oakland Raiders from Oakland Beach. Hell, dude can't even find the real Chad Ochocinco on Twitter (hint: the one with all the followers). Enjoy it while it lasts, my inebriated friend.

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